Soulful Strides to Promotion & Tenure (September 2024)
Setting Expectations
This summer, I spent a good amount of time thinking about the expectations placed on me by others, the expectations I place on others, and — most importantly — the expectations I place on myself. Hmm…side-bar:
I used to love the skit “Lowered Expectations” on Mad TV. I realize many of you may not remember this show, but it was hilarious. The skit was a play on dating sites and how singles set their expectations so high for finding the perfect love connection — one that met all of their qualifications, criteria, and then some. What made this skit super funny and realistic was that it showed people keeping it simple and then surprisingly finding that person.
As I reflect on expectations in general, this may actually be a better way to function in our professional and personal lives. The professoriate places very unrealistic expectations on us — we “need” this number of scholarly publications, this amount of funding, this number of committees, and this number of classes. Oh yea, and tenure and promotion by this date. Not to mention, our expectations to counter the professional and societal expectations. You know, don’t raise your voice, they expect you to be loud. Be on time and sit in the front, they expect you to arrive 5-10 minutes late and sit in the back. And my favorite, be sure to smile, be pleasant, and brush it off, they expect you to be angry.
How do these expectations play out in real-time in our ability to set realistic goals and in our ability to celebrate wins? And more importantly, how do these expectations impact our professional trajectory and well-being? I can tell you what these well-intended expectations look like - sleep deprivation, hair loss, increased mental health struggles, overwork, exhaustion, and burnout, and ultimately stunted career progression.
But wait — I don’t want you to think setting expectations for others or yourself is a bad thing. It only becomes a negative exercise when the expectations are unrealistic.
As you prepare for the journey toward promotion and tenure, guarding against unrealistic expectations will be paramount and will require intentionality. Simply put, it will involve setting healthy boundaries, fostering supportive networks, cultivating self-compassion and grace, and predetermining what success looks like for you.
Personally, my favorite approach to setting realistic expectations for myself is prioritizing progress over perfection. Instead of seeking perfection (Which doesn’t exist for the people in the back!), I set the expectation for growth and improvement, understanding that making mistakes and falling short are part of the learning process. By focusing on progress, you are able to maintain a balanced perspective, celebrate small wins, and embrace the journey.
Regardless of your profession, there will be expectations placed on you. However, we must be careful not to reinforce these expectations on ourselves or on those coming after us. As we settle into this new academic year, let’s set our self-expectations in a way that promotes well-being, counters the culture of hustle and unrest, and focuses on personal betterment. Let’s take our power back and set expectations that are aligned with our self-image and self-worth. Welcome to the 2024-2025 Academic Year!!!
“I realized that I don’t have to be perfect. All I have to do is show up and enjoy the messy, imperfect and beautiful journey of my life.”